Coffee Contemplations

Carmel Frappe?!?!?!?!

2008-05-28T12:58:00.005-04:00

Who have I become? Where am I going? I just finished a Carmel Frappe at Steamers in Cranberry. I am amazed at how many things have changed since the last time I posted. I am now married and moved into a completely new area. I am working at a new job, a year out of my surgery, and much less physically active as a result. I miss golf, baseball, running, working out intensely, hiking, roller-blading, and a lot of other things I used to do all the time. The sun is out and it reminds me of all the things i COULD have done prior to my herniated disc. Life changes so quickly and yet so slowly. What things matter and what things don't? How do you know when to turn the ship and when to just let the wind take it where it will? When do you order a Carmel Frappe to change things up a bit? Well for me it was when I filled my "get a free drink" card up with a bunch of inexpensive, and oh so delicious, cups of black coffee. So, things may not have changed as much as you thought, but perception is important as well. You may have perceived me as a new person who drinks "foo foo" drinks and is weaker but is that really true? Maybe I am stronger...strong enough to have a Carmel Frappe whenever I want. What you say may not matter as much to me any more. That is one of the changes that has definitely taken place. I am not as much of a pleaser as I used to be. I have definitely seen a change in that and here's proof for you. I drink decaf after 10:00 am now...

Ya...

I know...

Say whatever you want...

I like to sleep and I do what I want...It was a painful process whenever I accidentally kicked the caffeine habit. I started to have a couple of really busy weeks and before I knew it I was getting some massive headaches. By the time I realized why I was getting them I was going back and forth with my caffeine days and non-caffeine days. This was not a planned change but the pain of going back and forth was so bad that I decided to just eliminate the caffeine altogether for a while. Now I can have caffeine in the morning and it wears off by the time I go to bed but if I have it in the afternoon...I'm up all night (thank you Benedryl for your help in these moments of agony).

Well there you go. That is enough proof for you to know that I am less of a pleaser than I used to be. Maybe that is also due to being married. I will go into this more at a later time but there is a lot to be said for getting married and building your character. Well back to that Carmel Frappe...it is empty minus a couple of drips left on the bottom. That is similar to how I feel right now. How did the Frappe become that way? There was a repetitive action that drained it. An action that involved more sucking than pouring. That is how I got to where I am right now as well. The job I am in is sucking with not a whole lot of pouring yet. There is great potential with this job and the way I am going about it I knew that there would be a lot of sucking for the first year. I just need to see the pitcher on the horizon. I am drained because at the end of every month I have put in countless hours of work and there wasn't much pouring of financial help along the way. Where does this leave me?

How long will it last?

When do you turn the ship?

Am I doing all I can?

Am I listening to the Lord?

Is this just a growing moment?

Too much has been invested.

Do I work another job?

Questions...

Questions that suck...constantly.

Where are the answers?

Where are the answers that pour?

The Lord has the answers.

I need a refill...

Life Roast: bright and bold

2007-03-08T15:23:00.000-05:00

3-8-07

Wow, it’s been quite a while since I’ve been able to get out and write on here. I am now living in Pennsylvania. I’m at a coffee shop in New Wilmington called Mugsies sipping on a cup of Café Rojos. After asking where this coffee came from and seeing the look on this “barista’s” face I realized I’ve crossed the line. This line that I speak of may not be what you think. I have not crossed a line that other people draw and expect you to stay behind. I have crossed a line that shows I am officially a coffee aficionado. This word can be shortened into using the word fanatic. I am a coffee fanatic. Fanatic means, “Insane person”. I prefer to use the latin root “fanaticus” which means to be “insanely but divinely inspired”. Yes that’s it. I am insanely, but divinely inspired for my love of coffee. This is the line that I speak of.

Over the last few months I have been roasting my own green coffee beans at home. I enjoy this process of taking a raw material and creating something so pleasurable out of it. The little green bean looks so unappealing in its green form but when it is roasted, ground, and brewed (in whatever manner one prefers); all senses become engaged in the final product. In their original form they all look very much alike, with a few differences in color, size, and weight; but when finished every cup is different based on the process the endured.

I have been going through this process myself and I know it is because I am being crafted into a unique and complex “cup” with a combination of dry fragrance, wet aroma, brightness, depth, body, and finish. I have even recently been “ground” when I underwent back surgery. I will say that the process is uncomfortable but with the end in mind it is easier to withstand.

I have been recently struggling to fully understand what “the end” is. I know that Jesus is going to return, judgment is going to happen, and I will be spending eternity with Him but what about prior to His return. I will be living my life to “worship” Him but what does that look like today, tomorrow, in three years? I see how I am going through the process of becoming a “man after God’s own heart.” That is what I want, what I desire, but what does that mean for me? If I die before He returns I want to look back and see that my life made a difference. Why do I want my life to make a difference? What kind of difference do I want my life to make, on what, on whom, where at? The deeper I go into these questions the more I realize that the emphasis must be on the process. The way that I enjoy crafting a cup of coffee must be the way that I should enjoy being crafted. It is easy to do all kinds of crazy things to a bean like heating them to 400+ degrees and making them crack once or twice when you are removed from the process. How much harder it would be to go through that process but what a better appreciation, understanding, and love would you have if you did go through it. I know that this is what Jesus did for us. God has become fully involved and understands everything far better than I because not only did He create everything but He also knows first hand what I’m going through. He knows what it feels like to deal with the weight of sin, and knows what it is like to conquer. He knows how to fight, how to serve, how to lead, how to cry, how to rejoice, how to eat, drink, live, love, and move.

I do not know what I am going to turn out like but I don’t want to shortcut any of the processes. I want to undergo the screening process when necessary so that I will get rid of the broken pieces. I want to soak up the heat so that I will expand my capabilities even if it darkens my view of the world. I want to feel the pain of the daily grind so that I can fully appreciate the flavor of life. I want to rest when I need to so that my body will be enhanced. After all is said and done I want to be used up by my expiration date so that I will be fully effective in producing all that I can.

Pumpkin' Pie

2006-10-09T12:51:00.000-04:00

10-9-06

I am at Riverstop again. This may be one of my last moments in this coffee shop. Sipping on a creamed up cup of quarter “caff” coffee I reflect on the many moments that I have spent here. Transition is knocking on my door. I am already half way through the door but still cannot see fully what is on the other side. I am moving to Pittsburgh and will be much closer to my family. I have seen this change coming for about 6 months but am amazed that it is here. So many things have happened in these last months and have drastically changed how my time is spent. The lovely woman that I am dating is a joy and blessing to my life and will be accompanying me on this adventure. So, with all of that being said, my thoughts run to pumpkins.

Pumpkins, they come in many shapes and sizes. They are usually orange on the outside with grooves running vertically. They are turning out in great numbers at this time of year and have many purposes. I enjoy taking out their seeds and baking them with salt. I also enjoy allowing my grandmother to bake me; yes I allow her, pumpkin pies. These two things alone are enough of a purpose for me to know they are valuable but yet I want to know what else they do. They could be good for a very difficult game of bowling. They are used to make very ugly face and then lit up with a candle. I am amazed at how many different things pumpkins can be used for. A couple of the strange uses are things like skin care and candle holders.

I began to realize that humans love to find purpose in things. Finding purpose is a gift that people possess and must decide if they want to use. I have also realized that we are rarely satisfied with figuring out one purpose. I just recently spoke to a chemist that worked two years on figure out another use of an orange peel. There are times that finding new purposes can be beneficial and other times that it can be detrimental to the main purpose. When we start finding new purposes many times we forget about the old ones and do not find them meaningful any longer. If pumpkins started being worn as hats then we would stop cutting faces in them because it would ruin the hat. This is an extremely bizarre example of what the Body of Christ may be doing.

I enjoy learning about what the Body is suppose to be doing. I enjoy learning about the purposes of life for a Christian but I am seeing how rediscovering our original purpose is largely due to the fact that we forgot it in the first place. Being in the midst of a major transition I am seeing how many “discoveries” are not really discoveries at all. Rediscoveries can only happen when we no longer remember our original purpose. We were created to respond to God. This involves a relationship with Him. Worship and rejection are the only two options. Things become simple again when we remember that we have a decision to make in how we respond to God. I think we need to get back to the core. Pretty things can be made with a pumpkin shell but the core is what is important; without the core…the shell is dead.

emBODYing Candles...

2006-08-08T16:26:00.000-04:00

8-8-06

I am at Riverstop Café with my third cup of Columbian“half caff.”

I found the picture that is posted below and began to think about candles. Candles start our looking pretty nice; clean edges, colorful, cool shapes. Candles have a purpose though that is concealed within them. They are able to emit light. When the lights go out in your house if you don’t have a flash light then you can use candles. Candles can also be used to create mood lighting for various occasions. The problem is that a candle changes shape when it does what it’s suppose to. A candle begins to round out in some places, drip onto other things, and shrink in size. The life of a candle ends when its purpose runs out. The wick that is placed within the candle must be lit and then it will serve its purpose until the wick is used up.

I liken this to our lives as humans. We start out with soft skin, no bruises, and different shapes and colors. As life goes on we become more banged up and appear less beautiful to our own eyes. I can only imagine a candle looking at itself as it was burning. If it did not realize its purpose then it would be like…”Aw look…that’s sagging now.” or “I can’t control this liquid running down me.” Sound anything like what we experience as we get older?

So we have this purpose…what if we never are never lit? Our bodies still wear away but it is like a candle on a grater. The wick is sliced shorter with every pass and our bodies will continue to wither away. If we are never lit then we will get to the end of our life without ever having served our purpose.

If we have a purpose placed within us then we must recognize it so that we are able to be intentional about our lives. We need to realize that we were created to be light in the darkness. We need to see that our light is not our own but we are given light and we are created to hold light. We are able to have the God of the universe light us up. As we recognize our purpose we will start to see the wearing of our bodies as evidence that we are doing what we were created to do. We will then see the beauty of what is happening.

2006-08-08T15:58:00.000-04:00

Light in darkness

2006-07-19T11:16:00.000-04:00

Press On...

Intrigued?!?!

2006-07-18T14:48:00.000-04:00

7-18-06

Brian McLaren states that “clarity is sometimes overrated and that intrigue is correspondingly undervalued.” Ok… I’m intrigued.

What does he mean when he says this? I like clarity. I like to “see clearly the rain is gone.” I like to see the bottom of the pool when I swim so I know what I am swimming in. I like to see clearly as I drive down the road so I don’t run in to anything. Clarity is overrated…how do we rate clarity? I can see how we rate clarity pretty high on the scale. Ok, I agree that it has a high rating. What about intrigue being undervalued. I find that intrigue is used to draw us in. I am intrigued as to what he is meaning so I am drawn into the conversation. I want to know more about what he means. Intrigue is used to draw us in but then we abandon intrigue in the search for clarity. So we have a minimal use of intrigue and an intense desire for clarity.

What is clarity? Seeing something clearly, understanding, having something figured out. In our relationship with the LORD we want to see Him clearly, understand Him…figure Him out? Can we figure God out? Can we really see Him clearly in the state of decay that we are in? Our bodies are in a state of decay while our spirits are in a relationship with Him. Ok, back to intrigue, I am intrigued by Him. My intrigue draws me in. If I am constantly intrigued does that mean I will be constantly drawn in? Maybe we really do undervalue intrigue. If I was intrigued by the LORD more often wouldn’t that be the key to more clarity? I said that clarity is seeing Him clearly, understanding Him, trying to figure Him out. We want to have the clarity, but we overrate it. We see the value in the end, not the process. The process is what takes us to the end. We can not find the clarity we desire without being intrigued. Where does this intrigue come from? Can we make this intrigue come from ourselves? When I am intrigued by something it is that thing that intrigues me. I do intrigue that thing. God must intrigue us. The relationship begins with Him. The pursuit begins with Him.

I agree with Brian in that “clarity is sometimes overrated and that intrigue is correspondingly undervalued.” When we enter into the relationship with the One that brings clarity we will receive it…but the clarity is not the point…the point is the relationship.

Simply Be

2006-07-03T13:51:00.000-04:00

7/3/06

Sumatra Mandheling…it is a complexity of flavors that ends in a smooth spice. I am enjoying my experience with this cup. I am at Bitter End, a coffee shop in Grand Rapids. I am sitting here with my buddy Elch. We enjoy coffee, reading, discussing life, listening to music, and staring into space. This brings peace. Peace…we are not anxious in these moments, we are in our own worlds at times and then come back together to discuss what we’ve seen and heard. Separate but together…

How can we be separate but together? How can we be thinking our own thoughts but still be on the same page? I feel the key here is to “be”. This word is so complex. Two letters come together and say so much…

To exist in actuality; have life or reality: I think, therefore I am.

To occupy a specified position: The food is on the table.
To remain in a certain state or situation undisturbed, untouched, or unmolested: Let the children be.

To take place; occur: The test was yesterday.
To go or come: Have you ever been to Italy? Have you been home recently?
Used as a copula in such senses as:

To equal in identity: “To be a Christian was to be a Roman” (James Bryce).
To have a specified significance: A is excellent, C is passing. Let n be the unknown quantity.
To belong to a specified class or group: The human being is a primate.
To have or show a specified quality or characteristic: She is witty. All humans are mortal.
To seem to consist or be made of: The yard is all snow. He is all bluff and no bite.

To belong; befall: Peace be unto you. Woe is me.

Do we exist in actuality? Do we have life? Do we go? Do we come? Do we belong?

I think that all of these questions can be answered yes in the sense that we must have do all of these things to still be alive in the physical.

Do we do these things in the spiritual? Exist, have life, go, come, belong… Are we alive in the Spiritual?

Are we being physical…yes, we do that without thinking.

Are we being spiritual?

When sin entered this world did we stop being physical or stop being spiritual? Who were we distanced from? How should we pursue One that we are distanced from?

We must SEEK God…we have probably heard about a hole that only God can fill…this hole may be our spiritual side that is longing to be completed again. W are physical and spiritual beings that long to have both parts satisfied. I am fully alive when I am BEING fully physical and BEING fully spiritual.

Just as two letters come together in a complex way, and two friends can be totally different in totally different worlds but BE together so should we BE…we should SIMPLY BE.

Beautiful. Thank you. I want to be with you.

Game time...

2006-06-30T17:33:00.000-04:00

Beautiful:

This glove is unique to my hand…I have been placed in a position. My Father is playing with me. We have been playing for years, learning the game, enjoying each other. I haven’t had a glove because I haven’t needed it yet. I had to grow into it. The glove was being specially fitted for me. My Father has been teaching me how to care for this glove and move it properly. I had to learn when to raise it up and when to squeeze it. I had to learn how to care for it so that the softness and flexibility would still be there. It was made of fine leathers that were very supple and I didn’t want to mess them up.

I now have taken my position, I have learned to trust my Father, and I am equipped to play. The game is about to start and I get a little bit nervous. I don’t know if I needed to practice more or if I learned all the rules. I look into my Father’s eyes and I know that I have everything that I need. He has faith in me and I have faith in Him. I am ready to play any position but He reminds me that He only needs me to play the one that I am in right now. I need only remember what I’ve learned and enjoy the game. He throws me the ball and I squeeze at just the right time, the glove wraps around the ball and holds it until I am ready to pick it up with my other hand and throw it wherever my Father tells me. My palms are still a little sweaty, I am nervous that I might ruin my glove that is so precious. I am afraid to get it dirty but my Father assures me that it can withstand the pressure of the game as long as it is on my hand. He has carefully created it so that it will never fall off and will always be ready to go.

I start to realize that the point is not me or the glove but the game and being able to show everyone how incredible my Dad is. I have the coolest Dad around and other people see the game going on. They want to join in and play. They see us laughing and running, never stopping but constantly with each other. People begin coming from all over to play in the game that my Father started. I realize that I used to be on the sidelines where they were, or running around the concession stand getting snacks and other things but realized that the game was so much more satisfying. I realized that I couldn’t have a relationship with my Father if I was over eating candy.

He was calling out to the people at the concession stand all the time, “Come” and play over here. There’s room on the field, there are positions open…He would stand at the gates and tell them, “Come and follow me”. I’ll show you how to play. Don’t waste any more time, there is a game going on and I want YOU to play. I remember being at the concession stand and constantly running back for more…but now I’m with my Father…

…and I’m playing.

2006-06-21T14:40:00.000-04:00

Hidden

Linda

2006-06-12T17:39:00.000-04:00

I don't know who she is but I am sitting in a new coffee shop enjoying her blend. I think that the term blend is interesting. How often do we "blend" things and never even stop to think about what we are blending. We blend cultures in the U.S. every day. We blend ice cream with whatever we want to create a smoothie (so good). We blend coffee beans to get "Linda's Blend". We can have things however we want them and if we can't figure out what we want then we start blending the basics together.

Is this what we do in our faith? Do we have a whole bunch of choices and if we don't like any of them or they don't "fit us" then we start to blend them. Is it ok? We have blended worship styles, blended services, blended communion (literally some places just put them both together). We like to call much of this POMO or Post-Modern. I am doing a lot of thinking and studying on what the Post Modern Era is and how it is affecting our faith. I am interested to hear any thoughts that you might have...

2006-06-01T10:02:00.000-04:00

God Spoke

Becoming Cultured

2006-05-24T15:50:00.000-04:00

5-24-06
I am outside at a gorgeous café in Cincinnati. The sun is shining and the vines are providing shade in the outdoor gazebo. I enjoy the breeze on my face and The Fray playing softly in the background. The cup of French Roast Costa Rican coffee is still good even its current state of coldness.
I have been thinking about being “cultured” and how we relate to the unknown. We all encounter things that are new to us. When this happens how do we respond? What allows us to be able to take the unknown and make it known? Some may say that the very fact that you have encountered it makes it known. This is partially true but what happens before that. What takes place in the split second that something goes from unknown to known? I am realizing that the summation of all things known helps us to categorize the unknown. When you take a sip of a new drink or a bite of an unknown food you quickly use terms, textures, and thoughts from other things you’ve had to help put words and thoughts to the new substance. This is why being “cultured” is so important. The more things that we have encountered the easier it is to correctly interpret things that are new. How do we become “cultured” other than to encounter new things? This is why it is so important to have someone to follow. If we are not following anyone or anything then we will see everything new in an inaccurate way, at least in the beginning. Why did Jesus come to the earth? We now have someone to follow who has infinite understanding, infinite wisdom, and can see things perfectly. God has given us His Word and therefore we are able to be “cultured” by it. We do not have to fear going into new situations or places because our God has already been there and is everywhere with us. We are not really walking into new situations if we have the Holy Spirit with us. We are walking by faith. We are walking with God. We are already prepared for everything that we could ever encounter provided we trust in Him and not ourselves. We are running a race that is set for us. We are fighting a battle that is already won. Who is cultured? We are cultured. We do not have to fear where we are going because God is there.
I see immaturity coming out all of the time as people try to take their experiences and apply them as the ultimatum for what other people are encountering. Just because I had to deal with a grandfather who committed suicide does not mean that I know what everyone in the same position is going through or how they need to deal with their situation. I am not saying that we can’t ever help each other but I am saying that we can best help each other when we let God do the work. We can offer wisdom as we gain wisdom from God. We can help console people as God consoles us. We can teach people as God teaches us. Everything that is good comes from God. I am thankful for Him and desire to become more “cultured” by every moment spent with Him.
Let me know how God has “cultured” you lately.

Clanging Coins

2006-05-13T17:49:00.000-04:00

5-13-06

Change. I hate change. I will always give exact coins to avoid the annoyance of having extra coins jingling in my pocket and the weight that is associated with them.

I feel that change is coming and it is “weighing me down.” I know that God is calling. I know that God has a plan for my life. I know that I am willing to go wherever He leads. God is whispering; am I listening hard enough, long enough?

When you go the store and have exact change then you have a sense of accomplishment, fulfillment, exclaiming: “yes, exact change!” This sensation is demonstrated when we fill our gas tanks. There have even been commercials that show the “perfect fill.” This happens when you are pumping full tilt and stop it right on “$20.00” or with gas prices today “$50.00”. This doesn’t always matter though we still are fulfilled on some level when it happens. We use credit cards most of the time now so I don’t know why we always go to the next dollar if we can…even if it means overflowing our tank.

This is shown in life when we want things to work out just right. We travel full tilt through life. We want to hit the mark. We want to be able to have smooth transition. Leave with people happy and walk into a place that is a “perfect fit.” Is this how God works?

What if everything is going well and you get a call. I am known to not answer the phone. I’ve found that cell phones are the acceptable interruption and it drives me crazy. I could be talking with someone about a deep wound or problem and if their phone rings...conversation paused. This sometimes irritates the people that are calling but I give priority to the people that I’m with. I care more about the person that I am face to face with than I am concerned with hurting someone’s feelings for not picking up my cell phone. I wonder if this thought process has transferred into me answering God’s call.

Shouldn’t we put everything on hold if God calls, pack up and move out. Shouldn’t we be in constant communication with Him anyhow? This would mean that His call is just reminding us that we aren’t talking enough with Him. If we were, would He really need to call? Did I miss the conversation sooner or is He calling for the first time about this? I want to be in His will, not mine. I want to be with Him, not alone. I want to be a man of purpose, His purpose. I want to love, live, learn, lie, and leave with Him. My Savior, my God, my Friend, my Father, my Lover. I am His. He Is. I’m not. I yearn for YOU. Guide, lead, walk, run, hold, protect, and teach…me.

2006-05-12T12:59:00.000-04:00

Fallen...

The Depths of Conscience

2006-04-20T14:21:00.000-04:00

4-20-06

Once again I am at the cafe. It has been a while since I've been able to come, sit, and ponder. I have had a month full of travel and business so it is nice to get back to "chillin'". I just polished off a cup of Chocolate Almond and I've got my Columbian so now I can start typing.

God has been doing some incredible things lately. I had a chance to go to Nashville and meet the music industry. I got to meet artists and some of their families, managers, producers, promoters, publicists, and everyone that makes the industry go ‘round. It has helped me to find my strengths and question many things in my life. I will leave this sit for now but may post more on GMA Week and the Dove Awards some other time…

I have within me something that is invaluable. It has the ability to make me feel good or bad. It can let me sleep at night or keep me up for hours on end. I have the power to silence it over time or saturate it in things that will make it work as God intended. Conscience, the highest authority that any of us can appeal to here on earth, has been a main topic of contemplation lately after hearing a message by John MacArthur.

I have realized that when people come to me and accuse me of things that I don’t have to convince them of anything so long as I have a clear conscience. My conscience will convict me or will guard me from the accusations of other’s attempts to find me at fault.

OK…I am going to start blabbing not about me but just about conscience in general. I am not sure where this will lead but I am going to start flingin’.

Everyone has a conscience. Sometimes the conscience may be so saturated with garbage that it no longer functions correctly. Here is a brief example of how this could happen.

Let’s say there is a teenager that has grown up in a Christian home. This boy followed the head of his dad and saw some pornography on a Victoria Secret billboard at the mall. This was followed up when the magazine rack at the grocery store checkout caught his eye. He then saw his dad hesitate at a television show that had a beautiful woman on a shower gel commercial. A couple of friends rented an R video and the conscience had already been conditioned to think that this sort of thing was OK, natural for a growing boy, or what becoming a “man” was all about (going back to his dad). Unless something and or someone steps in this young man’s marriage is doomed. It will be impossible with such a messed up conscience for him to know how to treat his wife, what he should expect from her, or how to explain why he is addicted to pornography. He will not see a problem but even if he does then he will see it as “hopeless” because his conscience will be of no help.

Let’s see this same situation through a little different lens. This boy went to the mall and saw a Victoria Secret billboard but averted his eyes as he saw his dad do the same. He remembered that his dad had talked to him about how to treat a woman and how to become a real man. The same response was easy to take at the magazine rack again trying to be a man. His dad never let his eyes rest on another woman whether it was on the TV or anywhere else. This made it easy for the boy to call his dad for a ride when the friends were watching an R rated video before it even started. Do you see how the conscience was bolstered by capital “t” Truth because of his dad? This young man will have a conscience that protects him and his marriage for the rest of his life provided he continues to let it guide him.

So what do we do if our conscience has been messed up? What do we do if our conscience is convicting us or maybe we have tainted the conscience to the point that we aren’t even convicted by our sins? We have to ask God to renew our conscience and teach us what Truth really is. We have to get in God’s Word and seek Truth, spend time hanging out with God in thought and chatting with Him about our messed up lives. This example is only one (prevalent in today’s society) way that our conscience could be leading us away from Truth which is really away from God. God is Truth and if we want to get closer to Him then we must know what He is. We must be able to discern between what is good and what is bad. There is a phrase sometimes said in Church… “God is good” followed by “all the time”. This means that if we want to be close to God then we must ALWAYS be pointed toward what is good. How do we do this? We are saved by Grace through faith in Jesus Christ. The Cross allows us to come into God’s presence. We have to allow the grace that Jesus has provided for us to be enough. The problem is without a conscience that is seeking Truth we will be too proud to drop to our knees at the foot of the Cross. I have seen this time and time again. It is easy to say when things are going well… “whenever you are facing temptation run to Jesus”. Sin has a way of making us focus on ourselves and in the moments of temptation we are so focused on self and how important we are that we forget Jesus is waiting for us to want to be saved. The book I am reading “Healing is a Choice” hits this very same concept. We must WANT to heal, be saved, and then be humble enough to ask. Our conscience plays a very crucial role in the temptation not just in being convicted after the fact. Ask God to work in and through your conscience. I would highly recommend you listen to the sermon that John gave as well.

Wow, I almost sounded like a pastor there…I really am just speaking from what God has been teaching me and feeling that I should pass along my “Coffee Contemplations”. I know that I’m speaking from my heart when my coffee isn’t finished. Well I’m sure I’ll be able to ponder again soon. Until then…

2006-04-04T19:56:00.000-04:00

Isaac...takin' care of business

2006-04-04T19:55:00.000-04:00

Avalon

2006-04-04T19:54:00.000-04:00

Anthony Evans

2006-04-04T19:53:00.000-04:00

Batman Building

2006-03-29T13:06:00.000-05:00

Adventures

able to predict or...predictable

2006-03-29T13:00:00.000-05:00

Columbian…again… I am starting to wonder if I’m becoming a bore, if I’m slipping into a coffee rut. I don’t want to be totally predictable. I don’t want people to think that I never branch out and try something new.

I am a firstborn. How much does this affect me? I am precise, organized, and follow the rules. You wouldn’t catch me parking in a handicap spot, not even at 2:00 in the morning on a quick run to the grocery store in a snow storm. I am reading a book called “The Birth Order Connection”. It is really giving me some insight into why I think the way I do and what I should be looking for in a spouse. I fit the first born mold…somewhat. I love adventure and being spontaneous. I don’t like to draw attention to myself but would gladly lead people in worship or on an expedition because the focus isn’t on me leading. The focus is on where we are going and what we are doing. I am planning a trip to Colorado with two of my best friends. I am excited to go “rough it” in the woods and be a “man”.

I wonder how much my first born male mentality affects my life; my relationship with God. Do I strive for perfection when I should be resting in His arms? Do I push the congregation toward the same goal while leading them in worship? Do I miss out on the beauty of being able to rest in the midst of a mess because instead I stress? Do I worry instead of having faith and being “anxious in nothing”? Do I overanalyze; like right now?

I know that God loves me and has created me in His image…just the way I am. Why do I sometimes struggle to find that peace that surpasses all understanding? I want to be more like Him; strong, loving, gracious, passionate, peaceful, secure. I care too much about what others think of me and not enough about what He thinks of me. Thank God for grace!

How do you think your birth order has shaped how you view and respond to life; to God; in relationships? How can being aware of these things help you to handle them better?

FYI…I am now on a cup of…HIGHLANDER CRÈME J…I’M CRAZY!!!

Breathe: In and Out ...or... Out and In

2006-03-15T13:31:00.000-05:00

Well today I am having the Columbian again. I tried to get a cup and they ran out of that pot so I asked for another one to be made. They gladly made another pot and while I was sitting at my table they brought the whole pot over so I could fill my cup. I think it is cool how there are businesses based around service all over the world. As Christians this is a main part of what we are supposed to do. We are to serve our communities and the people around us.

Today we started working on a promotional video for the River Project that our church is doing for the community. It is based around bringing the river of life to our county. There is a very large river where I live. Two of the others pastors and I got in the river for a goofy promotion. I must remind everyone that there is snow on the ground in MI today. The river was barely above freezing temperatures as evidenced by the ice on the plants that were sticking out of the river. We could not feel our legs or feet for a few minutes after coming out of the river. I am excited about what types of services are going to be going on in our community.

OK, now on to my thoughts for the day.

In…Out…In…Out…In…Out…

(OR IS IT)

Out…In…Out…In…Out…In…

Before you think I am totally crazy I am talking about breathing. We take breaths in and out all the time. The question of what comes first is one that we always ask…chicken and egg, light and dark, seed and plant…you see what I mean. In regards to breathing the simple and obvious answer is we must breathe in before we exhale so that we have something to exhale. We like to think of something coming from nothing. Light is something and darkness is nothing…that is why God spoke light into the darkness, spoke the earth into existence. This shows us though that there must be something before nothing to create something. I will say that another way: without God there to speak into the darkness there would be no light. This brings me back, once again, to breathing. Without room for the oxygen in the lungs an inhale is impossible. Without oxygen in the lungs an exhale is impossible. This leads me to think that maybe we are always asking the wrong question. Instead of figuring out what is first maybe we just need to realize that they are both of equal importance and of equal value. Lets look at the chicken and the egg. There is a chicken and an egg…right? I would say that there is a chicken and an egg because there must be at least two chickens to create another egg. There may be two chickens, two eggs, or one of each but does it really matter? There was obviously someone or something to create the chickens too. Maybe that initial creator is much more valuable to spend our time contemplating than how many chickens or eggs there were. Maybe it is far more valuable to look at the chicken and the egg and worship the creator for creating. Maybe when we look at the seed and see the tree or see the tree and look at the seed we can be amazed at the contrast. A small seed produces a powerful tree and a powerful tree produces a fragile seed. I can look at the contrast and worship the creator for that.

I had a totally different point to make about the inhale and the exhale but I suppose I will save that for next time if I am still in the mood to talk about it. Let me know what your thoughts are on this topic. I look forward to reading your comments.

F1V3 CUPS

2006-03-07T16:46:00.000-05:00

Are 5 cups of a great coffee too many?

Even if you're tired and need to wake up?

Someone please tell me that this is ok :-D ...

Pain and a great Columbian

2006-03-07T15:45:00.000-05:00

Wow, I am tired! I am working 10-12 hour days Monday thru Wednesday so that I can take Thursday and drive home. I am thoroughly enjoying the best cup of Columbian that I have had here at the Café. It is a huge difference from the cup I had while writing the previous post. I will be leading a worship practice tonight and have been thinking about what to do for our small group devotional. I have been thinking a lot about healing lately.

We are created to heal. We heal from cuts and scrapes. We heal from emotional wounds such as a tough break up. We must be involved in order for things to heal properly. We have a choice as to whether or not a wound will fully heal. When we are cut, we must clean the wound so that it will heal fully and properly. If we leave the pebbles in our skin after a fall there is a chance of infection and potentially becoming re-infected. The word “infected” means, “to contaminate or corrupt”. Anything that contaminates or corrupts any part of us is an infection. As humans we have a tendency to focus on pain and see it as a bad thing when really we should be more concerned about the infection. I recently heard a story of a girl that could not feel pain. This young girl would constantly injure herself by biting into her tongue, or having something hot scald the inside of her mouth. I can not imagine grabbing a cup of hot coffee and drinking it quickly. The entire inside of my mouth would peel off, but I would experience no pain. Pain is something that is created to help us know when to stop doing something that is hurting us. We look at pain and say, “Why would God allow me to be hurt?” This question is easily answered by recognizing that the pain is not the problem but rather the action that was taken to produce the pain. There are some forms of pain that are unavoidable. Why must we still experience pain in these situations? We experience pain so that we know that something is not right and we must take action to avoid infection.

This is the case with our spiritual lives. We must recognize painful things that happen and clean them out so that we can continue to grow and not continue to experience the same pain over and over.

I enjoy pain because it allows me the opportunity to experience pleasure, such as this wonderful cup of Columbian…time for another! YES PLEASE!!!

Let me know what you think of pain being a good thing and how that is played out in your life.

2006-03-07T14:18:00.000-05:00

Love those Elixers

2006-03-07T14:17:00.000-05:00

My Taylor and a Friend

2006-03-07T12:56:00.000-05:00

Djembe and Taylor Photoshoot

2006-03-02T15:20:00.000-05:00

Ethan...adorable

2006-03-02T15:17:00.000-05:00

Checkin' out the MI sunset

Bad Coffee and the Cross

2006-03-02T15:00:00.000-05:00

Why do we settle? I am drinking Folgers Coffee. I don’t even know how to spell the garbage that is widely known as coffee. I am amazed that people everywhere want “Folgers in their cup” because I surely do not. I am really just using this cup of coffee as a way that I can blog right now. I went and grabbed a very strong cup of bad coffee so that I could type. Isn’t it funny how this works in life. We endure things that we don’t necessarily enjoy in order to accomplish something else. I wonder if Jesus was thinking along those lines whenever He endured the pain and death of the cross in order for us to live. I am amazed at how we like to compare things. I just compared the death of our King of Kings to a cup of Folgers. BLAH, another bad sip. Hmm…things that I do in order to do something else…I create a Tech sheet to avoid a hundred questions from the team members (though I get about 50 anyhow). I guess some things are worth enduring for something else.

How does God fit in? If I know that God is in control…that helps. If I know that God loves me…that helps. If I know that I am created to worship Him…that helps. If I know that I am forgiven…that helps. How does knowing all of this help? How do our responses help? Let me know what you think.

I’m finally done with this horrible coffee… I wonder if it was worth drinking…

2006-03-01T17:23:00.000-05:00

Crystal Trees

2006-02-28T14:40:00.000-05:00

Ice World

Simple Pleasures and Complicated Delights

2006-02-28T14:24:00.000-05:00

God has created us all with a dream, but a dream for what? If we are on a time continuum, which we are, then where are we right now? Are we at the opening gates, crossing the finish line, or coming around turn three? How many turns are left and how many bumps until the tires fall off?

I am thankful for times of reflection. There is so much that passes us by. We don’t even recognize most of what is happening in the world around us and then we complain about being bored. I live in Newaygo, Michigan. This is not the most happening place on the face of the planet. Even for those who live in Michigan few would be able to pinpoint its location. I am 23 years old and have recently become an associate worship pastor. I have complained of being bored and not having anything to do but I couldn’t tell you the names of three people in my apartment complex. I have lived around these people for close to eight months and I can’t even tell you a first name. I live above a nun, that’s about all I can tell you. I can tell you that I left a pumpkin outside too long and its guts spilled onto her deck. I can tell you that I have a date with that deck and will be scrubbing it as soon as the weather lets up. I find this whole phenomenon very sad. I have let 8 months go by and have said that I don’t have anything to do. What else have I missed? How many hurt people have I walked right past? I find this incredibly disturbing but what about the “simple pleasures” that everyone talks about. Does anyone really understand fully what a simple pleasure is? I find a simple pleasure in this cup of Columbian coffee that I am sipping on, the cup of Italian before that, and the cup of Raspberry Chocolate before that, but what is pleasure? Mr. Webster says that a pleasure is “the state or feeling of being pleased.” Well that’s helpful. Maybe we can find something a little more insightful. Maybe this is a simple pleasure, finding a definition for a word that doesn’t help at all. The second definition sheds a bit more light on what pleasure is, “A source of enjoyment or delight.” Ok, let’s make sure we understand this together. Pleasure is a source of enjoyment, and what I enjoy may be different from what you enjoy, therefore pleasure is completely objective. Simple is something that is not complex, profound huh? So a non-complex source of delight can be just about anything, for me it is a cup of coffee. I also find nature to bring me delight. Nature is not simple though. What can we call a complex source of delight? We could be boring and just say they are complex pleasures. One word that means the same thing as complex is confused. Are things, like nature, nothing more than a confused pleasure? I am now intrigued by the fact that we are to enjoy life’s simple pleasures but not pointed to the confused ones. Isn’t Christianity one of life’s confused pleasures? We have new denominations springing up every day and yet people don’t admit to the fact that Christianity is confused. God is steady and consistent, as everyone will admit but Christianity? I conclude that Christianity is a confused pleasure and that it is one that I am exploring daily. Oh, and I just now finished up a final cup of Italian, I can’t wait to visit that place.

2006-02-28T14:22:00.000-05:00

A tree in an Ice World

Reflections over a good cup...

2006-02-28T13:53:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone! I have been looking for a site to start blogging some thoughts on worship. I love coffee and will be enjoying a cup (or multiple cups) while I contemplate the world around us. I am a Worship Pastor in Michigan and enjoy times of reflection. Well I will begin posting regular thoughts that I hope will provoke thought and maybe some discussion.